At 44 years of age, a single gay man has spoken about pursuing surrogacy in the UK with his journey beginning as early as 2016 when he initially sought options to have children, navigating legal barriers that would later be lifted in 2019, allowing single individuals to become legal parents through surrogacy.
The man, who currently lives in Kent, has long dreamed of fatherhood, having previously envisioned unconventional scenarios to achieve it, including the possibility of marrying a woman while maintaining relationships with men. His commitment to becoming a parent solidified further after he met his partner, who he was with for four years, even though their differing levels of enthusiasm for parenthood eventually led to their separation.
Following the breakdown of his relationship, he decided to pursue the surrogacy path alone, a choice he made within weeks of their split. He acknowledges that while he has not experienced stigma from his decision, he is aware that he is part of a minority group of single gay men seeking to start a family.
His exploration into surrogacy has included engaging with Surrogacy UK, attending events to connect with potential surrogates and build a network of supporters. Additionally, he joined My Surrogacy Journey (MSJ), a platform akin to dating apps that facilitates connections between intended parents and surrogates through algorithms.
A crucial aspect of his journey has involved navigating the specifics of surrogacy options—gestational vs traditional—and addressing medical considerations after discovering he is a carrier of cystic fibrosis. This finding necessitated the use of donor eggs screened for the cystic fibrosis gene, leading him to acquire a larger pack of donated eggs rather than a standard quantity.
While actively searching for a surrogate, he has faced challenges in receiving a match. Despite making connections, his journey has been marked by the understanding that the process can be highly selective, with many factors influencing the decisions of potential surrogates. He noted that the average time to find a compatible surrogate can stretch from 18 months to two years, with many hopeful parents facing additional hurdles such as failed transfers and miscarriages once a surrogate is found.
Financially, he has planned for this journey, having received an inheritance several years ago which he has earmarked for surrogacy expenses, allowing him to avoid the financial burden often associated with such processes. The costs associated with surrogacy in the UK, particularly the non-remuneration policy for surrogates, present their own unique challenges, especially when compared to higher costs found in countries like Mexico and the United States.
As he continues his quest to find a surrogate, he remains resolute in his aspiration to become a father. His reflections on the dynamics of fatherhood convey a deep longing, as he expresses that the joy derived from being a godparent does not compare to the envisioned experience of raising his own child. He articulates a belief that he is destined to be a father, reinforcing his commitment to do everything within his power to achieve this dream, despite the uncertainties and complexities involved in the surrogacy process.
Source: Noah Wire Services
- https://brilliantbeginnings.co.uk/surrogacy-for-single-dads/ – This URL supports the claim that single individuals, including gay men, can pursue surrogacy in the UK, highlighting the legal changes in 2019 that allowed single parents to apply for parental orders.
- https://www.slaterheelis.co.uk/articles/divorce-family-law-category/understanding-surrogacy-laws-for-the-lgbtq-community/ – This article explains the legal framework for surrogacy in England and Wales, including the challenges faced by LGBTQ+ individuals and the recent legal changes affecting single applicants.
- https://www.allardbailey.com/surrogacy-gay-couples-uk/ – This URL provides information on how gay couples can use surrogacy to become legal parents in the UK, including the process of obtaining a parental order.
- https://www.gov.uk/parental-orders – This government webpage explains the process and requirements for obtaining a parental order, which is crucial for intended parents in surrogacy arrangements.
- https://www.hfea.gov.uk/treatments/explore-all-treatments/surrogacy/ – The Human Fertilisation and Embryology Authority (HFEA) provides detailed information on surrogacy, including the types of surrogacy and the legal considerations involved.
- https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/cystic-fibrosis/ – This NHS webpage explains cystic fibrosis, a condition mentioned in the article as a factor influencing the choice of using donor eggs in surrogacy.
- https://www.surrogacyuk.org/ – Surrogacy UK is an organization mentioned in the article as a resource for individuals seeking surrogacy options and support.
- https://www.my-surrogacy-journey.com/ – My Surrogacy Journey is a platform mentioned for connecting intended parents with surrogates, facilitating the surrogacy process.
- https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/family/parental-responsibility/ – This Citizens Advice webpage explains parental responsibility, which is relevant to the legal aspects of surrogacy and becoming a legal parent.
Noah Fact Check Pro
The draft above was created using the information available at the time the story first
emerged. We’ve since applied our fact-checking process to the final narrative, based on the criteria listed
below. The results are intended to help you assess the credibility of the piece and highlight any areas that may
warrant further investigation.
Freshness check
Score:
8
Notes:
The narrative mentions legal changes in 2019, which is current knowledge. However, there is no specific recent event or update that would indicate the story is very fresh. The context is generally relevant and up-to-date.
Quotes check
Score:
5
Notes:
There are no direct quotes provided in the narrative that can be verified against an original source. The narrative is more reflective and does not include specific statements that can be traced back to a particular individual or document.
Source reliability
Score:
9
Notes:
The narrative originates from The Independent, a well-known and reputable publication. This generally lends credibility to the information presented.
Plausability check
Score:
8
Notes:
The challenges and processes described in the narrative regarding surrogacy in the UK are plausible and align with known practices and legal frameworks. However, specific details about the individual’s journey cannot be verified without additional information.
Overall assessment
Verdict (FAIL, OPEN, PASS): PASS
Confidence (LOW, MEDIUM, HIGH): HIGH
Summary:
The narrative is generally plausible and originates from a reliable source. While there are no specific quotes to verify and the freshness is moderate, the overall credibility of the information is high due to its alignment with known practices and legal changes.
